Sunday, 4 March 2012

#26 Darren Malloy

You know that programme on the tele “Don’t Tell the Bride?” Yeah? Well don’t tell Stacy I’ve spent all the money we’d saved for the wedding.

What did I spend it on? It would be easy for me to say it was gambling. Because it was mostly gambling. I don’t know if you’ve ever been gambling before but it’s a fast and easy way to lose lots of money. Basically you try and pretend you know what is going to happen in the future with money, then you get it wrong and men take away your money. It’s kind of like a shop but you don’t get a pizza or a twix or a bottle of juice after the money goes away.

What am I going to tell Stacy? I was planning on either moving away without telling anyone or just brassing things out. Pretending I don’t know her and don’t know what everyone’s talking about when they mention the wedding. “Sorry, Stacy who?” That kind of thing. The more I think about it, running away seems the better option.

I know a lot of people will think I am bad to run away because of the baby, but I’m fairly sure it isn’t mine. You need to do stuff with a lady to make a baby, I know that much. And I haven’t done anything like that since the bonfire night I tried to make my friends think my winkie was a rocket. I had a lot of time to think about things after that in hospital. I also had a lot of time to finish Advance Wars 2: Black Hole Rising on the Gameboy Advance which was brilliant. I remember thinking about how stupid I had been trying to make my friends laugh. Trying to make them like me. I remember thinking that I should never do anything I don’t want to just to make other people happy ever again. And that I would get a Nintendo DS as soon as they came out.

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